Don’t tell him I said so, but my husband is a very smart man., I could learn a lot from him. For example, I could learn to worry less. He doesn’t seem to worry much at all. I could learn …
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Don’t tell him I said so, but my husband is a very smart man., I could learn a lot from him. For example, I could learn to worry less. He doesn’t seem to worry much at all. I could learn to write legibly like he does. Then he could read my writing in our checkbook. And I could learn to carry less stuff around with me. He carries his keys, wallet and cellphone in his pockets. My purse is as heavy as a bag of groceries after a sale on canned goods.
Of course, he could learn a few things from me too. For one thing, he could learn to read my handwriting. He’s had 36 years to do it, for heaven’s sake.
He could learn to wear sunscreen, eat regular meals and head to the basement when the civil defense siren sounds so I wouldn’t have so much to worry about.
And he could learn to carry a purse. Then he wouldn’t be forever asking me to put his pen, checkbook, snacks, bandages, pain relievers, phone charger, stamps, socket wrench and tire iron in mine. I suppose I could learn not to exaggerate from him.
As you can see, we both bring specialized knowledge to our relationship. We’re a team—better together, like all the best relationships are. The whole of our combined knowledge is far greater than the sum of its parts in the same way that chocolate chip cookies are better than their individual ingredients. Except for chocolate chips. Those are really good alone.
The point is, my spouse and I each have our unique areas of expertise. I know how to cook. Or at least I know how to cook better than he does. He knows how to run the snowblower.
I know where we store the extra paper towels and toilet paper in our home. He knows I’ll replace the empty rolls if he waits long enough.
He knows how to fix almost anything. I know how to break almost anything.
I know that I should never walk in front of the TV when he’s watching football. He knows we’re both happier if I eat regular meals and small snacks as well.
He knows how to keep our vehicles clean. I know how to keep our house clean. I don’t always do it. But I do know how.
I know how to choose healthful entrees from restaurant menus. He knows I’ll compensate for his bad choices by helping him eat the not-so-healthful items off his plate.
He knows how to use every single one of our television remotes and I know how to find them when he misplaces them.
He knows how to sleep at night. I know how to sleep during the day while he drives us.
He not only knows how to read a map; he knows how to fold it.
I not only know practically every song that comes on the radio when we’re traveling; I know how to clearly and insightfully express my opinion about them.
So you see, we’re smarter together. Our areas of expertise complement each other perfectly. He knows north and south, east and west. I know how to ask for directions when we need to. He knows how to do math problems. I know how to write nearly coherent sentences. He knows it’s best if he doesn’t disturb me when I’m working on a column. I know it’s best if I don’t let him read this one.
Dorothy Rosby is an author and humor columnist whose work appears regularly in publications in the West and Midwest. You can subscribe to her blog at www.dorothyrosby.com or contact at www.dorothyrosby.com/contact.